(Fabricated) Celebrity Translations
by
Carmen Acevedo Butcher
Shorter College
August, 2003

道可道，
非常道。
名可名，
非常名。

James Legge:

The Dao that can be trodden
is not the enduring and unchanging Dao.
The name that can be named
is not the enduring and unchanging name.

Modern-day Protestant evangelical preacher who misunderstands the classical Chinese text:

The Tuth that can be downtrodden
is not the absolute Truth.
the names that we use every day
are not enduring and unchanging as the name of Jesus is.

George W. Bush:

The government that can be defeated
will not endure as a country in this current climate of terrorism.
god is the name that can be named,
that is enduring and unchanging.

Richared Gere:

Way-making that can be physically realized
is not the way-making that is always becoming.
Any name that can be spoken or heard
is not the name that is always changing.


Robert Frost

Which way I go, I do not know,
the path leads through nirvana though,
and etymologies are things I seize
to make my poems fill up with snow.

Ice-T:

The white man's way is never true,
the names he chooses lie,
Come to the 'hood, and learn to speak,
Come to the 'hood, and learn to die.